Plain Truth: Practical ways for a husband to love his wife (Part 2)

This week we continue our discussion about practical ways of loving your wife...

The husband may also love his wife by giving her protection (Ephesians 5:28). There are times where one’s wife might try to do more than is able to. This is the time when a loving husband will stand his ground and say no or provide the necessary help. For instance, the working wife should be afforded protection from physical strain by hiring somebody who will take care of some family chores.

The husband may show his love for his wife by assisting her in fulfilling some of the household chores and responsibilities. There is nothing wrong in doing the dishes, cleaning the house, cooking, taking care of the children, changing nappies, and so on, if everything is done out of love.

The husband can show his love for his wife by allowing her to share his life (Mack, 1979:34). There are women who are married to husbands whom they know nothing about – their past, their inner feelings, their hopes and aspirations. There is no time for sharing the ups and downs.  Being married to such a man cannot be distinguished from being married to a stranger. The husband should love and trust his wife in such a way that it becomes easy for him to share his life with her and open up to her without the fear of being hurt. The more one opens up, the more she realises how much one loves her. Woman by nature need to be appreciated and loved.

The husband may also express his love for his wife by refusing to compare her with other women in any respect. He should grow an understanding that she is unique to him in every way. He should help shape her in such a way that he will, in the end, enjoy her uniqueness. You cannot show your love to your wife by comparing her with other women; instead, you will be demoting or devaluing her. She will in the end become jealous of the women she is compared to and think that the husband is more attracted to them (Mack, 1979:35).

Communication is the key to every healthy and lasting relationship. The husband can show his love for his wife in this regard by communicating with her in the most respectable way. The husband should always try to be gentle and not become rough in his speech to his wife. One of the most devastating things that a tongue can do is to criticise her or joke about her in front of other people. Do not make your wife look foolish in front of other people. 

Columns - Date: 30 October 2014

Prof Derrick Mashau

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