When Jeanette Mudau (37) of Dopeni in the Nzhelele area died last week, her family was devastated and overwhelmed with grief. They regained their strength and faced the reality that they had to give her a decent burial.

As per protocol, the family informed the local traditional leader at Dopeni and received a piece of land to lay their beloved to rest. On Wednesday, the family, assisted by the local community, spent the whole day preparing the grave for the funeral, which was scheduled for Saturday.

On Friday, the family received some shocking news that the grave they had prepared for their loved one had been desecrated and that a fridge was buried inside the grave. It is alleged that the damage was caused by headman Vhakoma Vho Bethuel Shavhani of Shanzha, an adjacent village, who is not on good terms with his counterpart in Dopeni.

The family was so confused that they did not know what to do, but they were advised by the Dopeni royal council to use an alternative graveyard to bury their loved one in order to avoid incurring more costs if the funeral was to be postponed. With the assistance of the community, the new grave was dug during the night, an exercise that kept the gravediggers busy until the early hours of the burial day.

At long last, the deceased was laid to rest, but not where the family wanted. At the gravesite where the funeral was held, the actions of the headman were widely condemned by all stakeholders present. An announcement was made during the funeral that a mass meeting was to be held at the local royal residence to decide the way forward.

Narrating the family's ordeal, Samuel Nenzhelele, the husband of the deceased, said the death of his wife haddeeply affected them as a family. "We were saddened and in mourning and still trying to come to terms with our loss," he said.

He said after the death he had followed all the protocols and was happy that even their traditional leader was at the gravesite to show them where they could lay their relative to rest. "We bought all the necessities like sand, bricks and cement for the erection of the grave stone. We spent a lot of money on all the preparations and we are very disturbed. Even the children are traumatised by everything that had happened," he added.

He said he was even more worried because the headman who had caused all the trouble saw them when they were busy erecting the grave but had not said anything to show his disapproval of the location of the grave. "We were deeply shocked to learn that he was the same one who had assembled hooligans to destroy our grave. We cannot even tell the reason behind the whole scenario, but we just wish that his conscience haunts him forever for the harm he caused the family," he said.

When approached for comment, Headman Ntsieni Makwarela, a member of the Dopeni royal council, was equally shocked. "This is the first time we have witnessed such a scenario in this village. We are still shocked, because we know that there should always be better ways of communicating if there are some misunderstandings. We cannot vent our anger or settle our differences via the dead. We will sit down as a community and see how to chart the way forward," he said.

He cautioned the community to be calm and not to be carried away by emotions and take the law into their own hands.

A defiant Bethuel Shavhani stood by his actions. He mentioned in a radio interview that "they cannot dig a grave on the road. I have heard that they are planning to come and harm me. Let them come, and I am ready for them."

Meanwhile, a village meeting was held at the Dopeni royal residence on Sunday. The meeting resolved that a delegation be sent to discuss the matter with Vho Thovhele Midiyavhathu Tshivhase, who is the owner of the land in question. They were scheduled to meet Tshivhase yesterday (Thursday).