The tragic death of Livhuwani Mamatsharaga, who hanged himself this week, has highlighted the need for education in communities.

The death occurred at a time when organizations, institutions and communities are speaking in one voice against violence of any nature.

Mamatsharaga (43), a well-known bricklayer from Ha Mutsha outside Louis Trichardt, was found hanging from the roof in his bedroom on Tuesday morning.

It is alleged that he had had an argument with his wife the night before the suicide. The argument is said to have been around an extra-marital affair he allegedly had with another woman, which led to the birth of an illegitimate child. It is alleged that the couple could not reach consensus about the other family.

Ms Tshinakaho Masindi, an aunt of Mamatsharaga, who also discovered the body, said the couple had been trying to solve the problem for some time, but could not reach an amicable conclusion. “His wife phoned me on Saturday, informing me that he had not returned home on Friday. She was worried, because his phone was off,” she said. Masindi said she suggested that they report the matter to the police, but were stopped from doing so after receiving information that he had spoken to his pastor and confirmed that he would be home by Monday.

She said she became worried after realizing that the problem they had tried to solve on previous occasions still persisted. “I arranged to meet them with other family members on Monday, with a view to finding a way to resolve the problem, which was threatening to tear their family apart,” she said.

Mamatsharaga arrived late in the afternoon from work and found them waiting.

Pastor Prince Ramahala of the Tsianda Full Gospel Church, who had been trying to assist the family on previous occasions, was also called to be part of the reconciliatory meeting between the two. The meeting went well into the late hours of the night, but with no solution being found for their problem.

Masindi said it was evident that Mamatsharaga was not himself, as he could not put his position clear concerning the other family he had. “We could see that something was not right with him as he did not even respect his pastor as he used to do,” she said. The pastor ultimately prayed for them and Mamatsharaga even accompanied Masindi in his car.

She said she was surprised to receive a call from his wife in the morning, informing her that she had not slept at home the previous night. Before they could finish their conversation, a man who worked with Mamatsharaga arrived and said he had waited too long to be picked for work and that his phone was just ringing without being answered. That was when they decided to go to his home, only to find him hanging from the rafters.

The death has shattered her aunt, who had hoped that one day their problem would be solved and they live in peace.

“It hurt me. I never thought he would ever think of taking his own life. I brought this boy up after the death of his mother and we have bonded since then,” said the anguished Masindi. “We have experienced death in the family, but this one will haunt me for the rest of my life,” she said.

Pastor Ramahala, a well-known marriage counselor, said this was a sad state of affair communities found themselves in. He said many in the community found themselves in affairs outside the family, which had led to families breaking up and even tragic endings where couples would kill themselves. Sometimes men would even go to the extent of wiping out their families.

Mr Bardwell Mufunwaini of Munna Ndi Nnyi Men’s Forum, who is also a champion of non-violence, said he was saddened by the sudden upsurge of violent deaths because of feuds between couples. “We have witnessed more deaths as a result of arguments and misunderstandings in families this year. This despite the campaigns we are holding every now and then in the community. Something needs to be done before many lives are lost,” he said.

He advised those with problems to approach trained personnel and organizations like his where they will be helped without even paying a cent.

Mufunwaini said those who feel they cannot continue together had better opt out rather than force relationships that are not working out.