A petite young girl, who is four months pregnant after she fell in love with a sugar daddy, says her story should be a lesson to her peers.

“I have learnt a lesson, but it is a pity it should be at such a great cost,” said Thelma Mabasa of Gumbani. She said after the man twice her age made her pregnant, he dumped her and went back to his wife.

“He stayed with me in a room in Block P East in Thohoyandou after he had made me believe that he loved only me,” she said. One day, when she came back to the room, she found he had taken all the belongings and vanished into thin air.

This turned her life upside down. This week she decided to come out of her cocoon and poured her heart out to this paper. She said she could not keep it to herself and wanted to share her story with other young women to advise them against falling in love with married men.

The woman, who was being supported by her sister as no one at home was employed, said she did not know what to do as her sister could not support her and her child. “My sister does not even know about my pregnancy, and I am afraid to tell her,” she said.

“I fell in love with this man in 2009 and everything seemed to be going right. We moved in together in February last year at Thohoyandou PE east, where we shared a room,” she said. The man told her that he would never go back to his wife as he claimed that she was giving him many problems. To prove that they were starting a new life together, the man also sold the house in which he was staying with his former wife at Maniini.

The office administration student, who is studying at one of the colleges around Thohoyandou, said she was also forced not to use contraception, as the man wanted a child with her. “We were so much in love that I could not say no to anything that he wanted. I gave myself my all to him, knowing that he loved me. That turned out not to be the case,” she said. She said the man went as far as introducing her to his family and she did the same to her family.

Mabasa’s ordeal started in April this year when the man started behaving strangely. “This man, whom I loved so much, disappeared. I later found out that he was going back to his wife and that he had moved to his family’s home at Sibasa, where he is staying with his mother,” she said.

She said when she tried to raise the matter with his mother, she found that his mother had also turned against her and did not want to hear anything about her. “I sacrificed a lot for this guy when things were not going well with him. I even helped him with money from home after he promised that he would repay it, but he disappeared with my property and money,” she said.

She said she had taken the matter to court because he did not want to repay her and he was no longer taking her calls. “I am now pregnant and will not abort the child as it is unchristian. However, I have a burden of raising the child, while also completing my studies. I am even afraid to face my sister, who has sacrificed a lot for me. I need help from somebody, so I can complete my diploma,” she said.

Mabasa has this advice for young women: “Do not be fooled by older men. They will promise you heaven and earth but will end up ruining your future. Take your education seriously and marriage will come at the right time," she said.

In reaction to the accusations by the young woman, the man said that she was telling lies about him for the sake of destroying him and his family. "I was living in darknes, but I have found the Lord. All I did with her was not right and caused a lot of pain to my family. Now that I have found grace, she must allow me to look after my family, but I am not totally taking her out of the picture,” he said.

He said he tried to be polite with her, but she became very rude and also started threatening him. “I did not mean any harm to her, but I have a family to support. I was just about to explain the situation to my pastor when she started being hostile. She must just change her behaviour and we can settle this matter amicably,” he said.

Mabasa needs support to complete her diploma. Those who can assist her can contact her at 083 999 1484.